Friday, February 26, 2010

5 more days

5 more days until our next court date. Praying for God's timing to line up with ours. I just read this scripture on the yahoo group and thought it was so fitting:

"So let's not allow ourselves to get fatigued doing good. At the right time we will harvest a good crop if we don't give up, or quit. Right now, therefore, every time we get the chance, let us work for the benefit of all, starting with the people closest to us in the community of faith." Galatians 6:9-10 The Message

I have also been listening to the following song over and over today. This song is by Mercy Rising, a christian band that Mark is the drummer for. I am so proud of what they are doing and the ministry they have created with their music. The very first line of this song is "Sun rises, sun sets, how long will you forget. How long will you forget me God...." I can't tell you how many times I have thought (even if only for a brief moment) those exact words while on this adoption journey. You really have to put all your trust in God and lay it all down, no matter how hard it is. There are so many unknowns and things that you don't understand and probably never really will. That is why I am so glad I have a God that loves me and is always there so I don't have to try and understand. I just have to trust in His love! To listen to part of the song go to:

I would add the MPG3 file here but can't figure out how!

Monday, February 22, 2010

Court Date #7

Anna called today. Our next court date is March 4th. Lucky number 7. Please pray that this is the day God plans to complete our family! Please also pray for other AWAA families. There were quite a few today that went to court but did not pass because they didn't have the recommenddation letter from the ministry of women's affairs. I know personally how completely frustrating that one piece of paper can be! Praying for God's grace and for him to move the mountains to bring these children to their forever families. A lot of people love them!

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Amazing God.

Our God is an amazing God. I have definitely felt the prayers and support over the last few days. Last week was without a doubt the most difficult week we have went through with this adoption journey. It was so much, ups and downs, within a short timeframe. We have received so many emails of support and encouragement that I am overwhelmed with the love that is already there for our baby boy. Especially my friends in the yahoo group. Friends that I have never met face to face and have only interacted with over the internet. I do not know what we would do without this support system. They have been through the fire and have come out on the other side. As I was asking myself and God why on Thursday I received an email that said simply, maybe God gave this child to us because he knew we would continue to persevere for him. We would not give up without a fight. Any family who received this referral would have went through all these trials and maybe some families would have grown weary and gave up by now. I know without a doubt 100% in my heart that this child is the one we will call our own. We were made to be parents to this baby boy. I will not give up without a fight. That doesn't mean that this fight is not trying and emotionally exhausting. But I cling to the fact, the bible says God will not give us more than we can handle. Though we may feel like we can't handle one more thing and at the time it may be difficult but He has never left my side and He never will. He has put the right people in the right places to lift me up. When we were to weak to stand on our own, He put the people there to stand up for us. We are being held the entire way through this process. When we are weak, He is strong. It is in this I find my strength and comfort. It is my faith and love for God and more importantly, His love for me that will get us through. There have been numerous times this weekend where I just wanted to climb up in Jesus lap and not leave the comfort of his arms. I have been listening to the song by MercyMe "Keep Singing". The lyrics go like this:

Another rainy day
I can't recall having sunshine on my face
All I feel is pain
All I wanna do is walk out of this place
But when I am stuck and I can't move
When I don't know what I should do
When I wonder if I'll ever make it through

I gotta keep singing
I gotta keep praising Your name
Your the one that's keeping my heart beating
I gotta keep singing
I gotta keep praising Your name
That's the only way that I'll find healing

Can I climb up in Your lap
I don't wanna leave
Jesus sing over me
I gotta keep singing

Can I climb up in Your lap
I don't wanna leave
Jesus sing over me
I gotta keep singing

Oh You're everything I need
And I gotta keep singing

I have found great comfort and strength in music through this journey. It seems every day I find a new song that seems to speak to the journey we are on. I just turn up the radio really loud in the car and sing to God as loud as I can because when I can't find the words to say what I am feeling, there always seems to be a song that sums it up better than I could. Even though God already knows what is on my mind and in my heart. I love the fact that I am not in this alone, I have the comfort of my father's arms around me holding me up when I can not stand. I would be lost without Him.

Please pray as we start this week, we do not know what is going to happen or if things will move quickly. PLease pray for our hearts, strength and paitence as we start another leg of this journey and only God knows his plan. I am praying with all my heart that his plan is to bring our baby home! But no matter what his plan, I will continue to keep singing and praising His name because He is the one that keeps my heart beating!

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Did not pass again....

Once again we did not pass court today. We did get the letter from MOW@ but the person who wrote it based his information off of the "original file" that was incorrect from October. They did not look at the entire file to review all the new information from the investigation and rework done in Nazareth which is the correct information for Daniel. So what happens now is we will go to the court tomorrow and appeal the rejection letter (the court is aware of all this and hopefully will get things moving quickly), the court will then subpoena MOW@. A new letter will get written and we will get a new court date. We currently do not have a new date as of today, hopefully we will get more information tomorrow.

Frustrated and heartbroken....

Please pray for all this to come together quickly. Please pray for paitence and strength for us as we continue to wait.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Greatest Support System

I just want to say we have the best support system I could ever ask for. I have definitely felt the love and definitely the prayers from everyone the last few days. These have been the hardest 3 days I think I have ever been through emotionally without a doubt. I am so thankful to God for putting the people we need in our lives at the perfect time. I don't think we could have made it this far in this adoption without two things, the first being God. He has been our rock and held me when I didn't think I could make it through. I feel his love and support most, especially when I hear the words I am sorry unfortunately... (just an FYI not one of my favorite sayings, along with "just one more day"). I am glad he loves me more than I can comprehend or even begin to understand. Second, our friends and family. Tonight I was not in the best of moods and mentally and physically exhausted from the last couple of days. Wednesday nights are CRASH nights (our junior high/middle school program at church), once again I asked if the kids could pray for our case tonight. Let me tell you the best encouragement you can get comes from a junior high student. Their laughs are infectious and they love having something to be part of (like praying to bring a baby boy home from Ethiopia). Tonight after we watched video and talked about the great weekend they had last weekend at CIY. Then after a song and invitation to get baptised, we gathered as a group with me in the middle and they prayed over me for our court date tomorrow. 3 students prayed (I love the prayers of a junior high student). Then we had a cake, it was so cute, it said "Can't Wait to Meet You Daniel". Here is a picture:

It was great night with lots of much needed hugs, prayers and support. I love my CRASH family volunteers and students. The best part of the night, 2 students got baptised and at least 2 more are talking to their parents about it! I love the way God works. Keep praying tonight is the night we are finally parents to this sweet baby boy. God is good, he can make it happen.

# 6 tomorrow

No letter today so we did not pass court. There are power outages in Ethiopa which could have been the cause. The judge did say to come back again tomorrow. So once again, one more day. Please pray that we pass tomorrow and can officially call him ours! Also please pray for paitence as mine are starting to wear thin. I know God has a plan and He knows what he is doing. Good things come to those who wait, but the waiting is getting old...

Tomorrow will be our day...

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Didn't Pass - #5 tomorrow

We just heard from Anna. We didn't pass today. She said of all the calls she had to make today, she did not want to call and tell me we had to wait one more day! It is not bad though, the judge went through all our paperwork. The only thing missing is the letter of recommendation from MOW@ (ministry of womens affairs). The judge agreed to hear our case again tomorrow. We need this letter to be signed, sealed and delivered to the courts before then. Please pray, we will go to court again tonight while we sleep (while everyone else sleeps). One more day, it is just one more day. God will not give us more than we can handle. This is what I keep telling myself. I will be praying, pleading and begging God tonight. Please God let us hear those words, "you pass" tomorrow.

Dear Daniel

I have thought about writing a letter to you but until now did not know what to write. It is about 1:00 in the morning and I am unable to sleep. You see the courts are probably just opening in Ethiopia and our case is in line for the judge today. I am praying in about 9-10 hours we will get the phone call we have dreamed about for the past 8 months, "you passed court". This is the point where we can share with the world what we already know in our hearts. Introducing our baby boy. There are so many people that have prayed for you and been on this journey to you with us. We have dreamed about a family for awhile now. On June 11th 2009 I knew our journey was on the right path. You see that is the day we first saw you. We loved you from first sight. A little 3 month old baby boy that we only met in pictures and on paper. I did not know that my heart was capable of such love for someone we had not held or met. For the next 8 months we watched you grow up in pictures, crawling, standing, getting teeth, etc. With every step we loved you more and more. With every delay our hearts ached but we knew you were in good hands. God was watching you. Now in just a few short hours it could be official, you will be our son. I could not have asked God for a more precious baby boy and I am so thankful that he brought you, our smiling sunshine, into our lives. I am living for the day when we get to stand at the bottom of those steps in Ethiopia and hear our name called out and we get to see you for the first time. I can only imagine how my heart is going to burst with joy. We will be together soon! Until then we will continue to watch you grow in your pictures and pray that it will be only a short time until you get to come home! We will be a family soon. We love you.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Tonight is the Night!

Tonight is the night! While we sleep an Ethiopian judge will hear our adoption case for Daniel. Please pray with us that he says "you pass" and we can officially introduce Daniel as a Heddleson. I can't believe the nervousness I am feeling this morning knowing that tomorrow our whole world could change with one phone call. I know this is coming eventually but it seems surreal now that it is here. Our 4th court date and the paperwork is completed and is actually going before the judge. I don't think I am going to get much sleep tonight. I have a feeling tonight will be a sleepless night. We spent the weekend preparing for him to come home again, washing clothes, putting them away, putting the ones that won't fit anymore in a bin and arranging things that have just been thrown in his room. I can't wait to look in that crib and see that precious baby sleeping. If I am this nervous today what is tomorrow going to be like until we get the call?

My soul, wait silently for God alone, for my expectation comes from Him.
- Psalm 62:5

Tonight is the night!!!!!!!!! Please God let tonight be the night.

Friday, February 12, 2010

3 Days

I can't believe our court date is only 3 days and 15 hours away! I am praying, begging and pleading with God to let this be the day we officially become parents to the precious baby boy we have been staring at for the last 8 months. As I was laying in bed last night at 1:00 in the morning and not able to sleep the thought hit me, our whole world could possibly be changed in less than 2 months. We will fly 1/2 way around the world to a foreign country and will be given a 10 month old baby boy and sent on our way. Minor panic started to set in, not only for the 17 hour plane ride (not a fan) but also for the 4 days in a hotel with a baby trying to bond. I know this is just Satans way of taking the joy out of our journey and I know everything will be great when we get there but for that brief moment I thought to myself "am I ready for this". Truth is I am beyond ready and was just letting my imagination get the best of me (or better yet Satan). I have been preparing for this moment for almost 2 years now with the adoption and about 4 years now planning for our family. As I am writing this post I am thinking what a journey we have been on! I am so thankful I have God on my side because I would have never made it through this journey and grown as much as I have in the last 2 years without him. Please pray with us that God blesses us with the gift of our son officially on the 16th. Our case will go before a judge in Ethiopia on Monday night the 15th while we sleep (while you sleep, I don't think I will be sleeping much). This is all in His hands and He will take care of us. I have a calendar on my desk at work by Stormie Omartian that has prayers and scriptures every month. The prayer for February is so appropriate for what we are going through:

"Lord, I put my hope in You. I submit my life to You. Help me to pray about everything and trust in You in every part of my life."

The scripture I have been reading multiple times a day:

"My soul, wait silently for God alone, for my expectation comes from Him." - Psalm 62:5

This is what I will do wait for God to bring my family together. Tuesday is our day! Please God let Tuesday be our day!