What do you do when the parenting moments go from easy go with the flow to tough? Like when your child has to have a minor procedure that requires them to be put to sleep and you hear words like outpatient surgery, recovery, bring comfort items, etc. We are faced with these moments now. It sounds all kind of silly, you know a minor everyday procedure, nothing life threatening, nothing scary but yet it is so scary to this mommy heart. It is not even the procedure that scares me, it is the thought of the anesthetic and going to sleep that scares me. Not knowing any family background, medical history, allergy information makes this hard for me. I am not sure why, maybe because I have a hard time coming out of anesthetic. I come out of it enough for them to send me home and nothing more. So I am not a fan. But the thought of them taking Daniel in a room without us for 45 minutes and then seeing him in recovery breaks my heart. Does this happen to all parents? I am telling myself yes.
Tonight when we were putting Daniel to bed, we were walking him through our day tomorrow. We will get up, get dressed and go see the doctor and then we are going to come home and lay in mommy's bed watching movies. He loves to do that because we don't get to do that often. I even bought him a new movie to watch tomorrow and my mom taped a bunch of Handy Manny's. But while we were putting him to bed we prayed (he loves to repeat what we say when we pray at night, that makes my heart full listening to him) and he looked at us and said "Yea Jesus", which means sing Jesus Loves me (how perfect). So we sang Jesus Loves Me and he wanted to sing it again. He loves to sing that song but it actually comforted me tonight too. I know Jesus loves us and he will be with Daniel in surgery tomorrow. We have a lot of people praying for us. While we were rocking singing MMMM Baby (Daniels made up nite nite song) I couldn't help myself and broke down crying. Thank goodness it was dark or that would have been another long conversation. It is going to be a long day tomorrow and I am pretty sure it is going to be hard for this mommy to keep it together.
The hardest part of this is Daniel can have nothing in the morning to eat or drink. He can have clear liquids before 6:00 am. We don't have to leave the house until 7 and I am pretty sure I am not going to wake him up before 6 just for some water. Surgery is at 9:30. No food and no apple juice in the morning is going to make for a crabby baby boy. Keep us in your prayers for that because the only time Daniel is not happy is when he is hungry.
I know we will get through, we always do because God is with us. He has a plan and will hold us in his arms. I am pretty sure I am also just overreacting and being a paranoid parent! But that is my baby boy, I waited a very long time to hold and love with all my heart. He makes our world whole. God had big plans for him so I know he will get through this and we will laugh at this post one day. Until then God protect us, keep us sane and be with us tomorrow as we face this new journey in our lives right now.